der Bauberzerg - 03. Monsa, or Dame Isaac

 Monsa, or Dame Isaac

Monsa is another nurse at Barbaret Bobin. Her real name is anything but, and I call her Monsa because she looks like Mona Lisa (although she has more curls) and Monsa is short for Mona Lisa, plus with that many curls in her hair and the way she styles her hair, she also looks alarmingly like everybody’s favourite physicist who got smashed in the head by a Trinity apple. Yes, I’m talking about you, Sir Isaac Newton.

Monsa was present at a few key moments during my entire stay at Barbaret Bobin. She happened to be on shift the few times restrictions ran rampant and I was anything but cheerful. Monsa, however, kept her cool throughout. When I attempted to force my way into the house of the dragons (a code we use with fellow ward mates referring to the nurse station) Monsa got a few security guards to stop me, and when I tried to be naughty and fight my way through and during the process almost fell over, Monsa asked the security guards to let go and let me fall. I landed on my tailbone and it hurt so much I thought my entire lower vertebrae was at the epicentre of a huge earthquake. The fall subdued me; Monsa then sent me back to my room to calm down.

A few other times when Monsa was on shift, I got into petty argument with her about the roster board. There is a roster board in the common room where the day nurses put down a list of who is on shift as well as which patient inhabits which room. I discovered that some people don’t or won’t put down their real name. I was amazed at this, then took it the wrong way and got grumpy, and then got over it and joined the fray myself. I put down a fake name that rhymes with my surname, and I did the same with the entire ward. Without their knowledge or consent I made fun of all of my ward mates by inventing an alias based on their reported real name and wrote everything up. The nurses were victims of this prank also. 

When Monsa realised, she got a less senior nurse to erase everything. I wasn’t very happy, because I wanted everyone to read it, to admire my intellect or lack thereof, and to have some fun. It did not occur to me back then that some people might have taken offence to it. I was that thick and that thick-skinned.

Further stay at Barbaret Bobin saw my condition improve. After a while, I started to shrink back to my usual humble self and I noticed Monsa’s attitude shifting along with. Monsa became more cheerful and more patient when I asked for something. Instead of asking me to wait an indefinite wait, Monsa got on to my business with absolutely no fuss. It can’t just be coincidences that Monsa happened to be free when I asked her for something. It must be because I was getting better and Monsa in turn adjusted how she worked with me, smart lady she is.  

Monsa was not on shift the day I was discharged. I wonder how she’s doing now. Probably still busy as usual and during moments of free time chatting and laughing with her colleagues. 

All the best to Monsa 

from Nancy, an ex-patient